where do we go from here...
...honestly?
...maybe... we decide where we are going to put our Trust... our Hope.
will it be in things and people that are temporary... ?
fixes...
achievements...
family...
friends...
all of which -- ease the emptiness. all of which... numb the pain...
but...none of which take it away and leave us feeling complete and whole.
these are not reliable, i've concluded through quite a lot of thought.
...and i am not able to rely on myself... as -- we were designed as relational beings - not singular as to be completely self-sufficient.
Still with the leading question, i (more so rhetorically) ask...
then what?
..Where is God in the mess of this life, i wonder? ...and is he this major missing piece?
I think ... He's just going to have to... do something... drastic. to get through. ...and i really think he will. Cause... truthfully, He is a God of desperate people..
if he wasnt, he wouldnt be able to love without conditions as he does...
and if really all we can lean on is love.. if he really is capable of that love... Then maybe he really is what is missing.
the what will it take though...
i just dont know.
desperation...?
damn it....
my confusion ...yes...staggering.
He's there. He's always there. Just give it all up to Him and let Him take over. Life is too complicated to try to figure out on your own. It's hard to let it go but once you do, you'll feel the freedom of it all. It's not that all of the sudden things will be easy. It's more like eventually things will be more clear. Clarity, peace and serenity take over and you know He's taking you in. I'm not saying your life is going to wonderful and "fixed" but you'll feel the peace in it no matter the situation.
ReplyDeleteHang in there. Hope you're doing well.
xoxoxo